I still don’t understand it, and some days I still question why God had to do this. Why he had to take away the best friend I’ve ever had. But I’ve accepted that God does know better than us, and some answers we just won’t get here on earth. The hardest thing for me now is wondering what he would be doing in his life now and wishing he could meet my kids and his sisters’ kids. It’s hard going on without him, but I know he’s looking down and smiling at me and blowing me a kiss.